Spa Logic

Spa logiiiiic

We have a spa on board, wand while feeling especially insane and stir crazy, I went to the spa to relax, because that’s what I have in my 13 story house that I share with 2,000 people and 1,000 servants, to quote a castmate.

So I steamed, showered, slept with a book on my wet bikini, heh, and went back to the locker room to change. I was very blissed out and calmly got my stuff out of my locker. It’s like any spa—they give you a key that you wear around your wrist with a little phone cord like holder. So behind me was a standard, middle aged, average sized woman in a bathrobe, just standing there, but I was so relaxed I didn’t care. She goes “well, you’d think they’d give you lockers far away from each other.” I said “what” she said, sarcastically, “I mean there are sooo maaaaaaany of us in here.” I still didn’t get it, then as I was getting dressed, she opened the locker directly next to mine. The whole room was empty. I said “oooh, I see, yeah, I guess you’re right.” She then said, “oh well, I guess I just like logic!” and frowned and cocked her head sideways and pursed her lips like you do when you are a stranger who tells other strangers why things are crazy.

She then got dressed.

She put on a cover-up that was a t-shirt which went to her knees, and on that t-shirt was a cartoon of a woman’s body, very tan, and in a neon-pink thong bikini. Like those shirts guys wear with a 6-pack and pecks airbrushed on the front. The curves of the cartoon boobs and can were accentuated with gold glitter. She was also too short for the cartoon body, so it looked like a vaguely porn-ish woman with incredibly short legs—like legs as long as her torso. I guess she just likes logic!

Also, in teaching improv classes to kids, we have a question and answer session for them. The counselors wisely said “no personal questions” which is handy because in someone’s class, one kid raised his hand and said, “for future reference, how much money do you make?” So this time we got these questions:

a) “Can I tell a joke?”
b) “Can I tell a joke?”

Then after we said “Our show starts tonight at 8:15” a kid said he had a question which was “And what time does it end?”