I am back on board a new ship. This is the Jewel, and it is crazy. It is new! It is well decorated! Things are understated! Things are snazzy! And oh Lord, oh happy day, oh all is changed and we are born anew:
I have a porthole.
I HAVE A PORTHOLE! THE PORTHOLE! THERE IS A PORTHOLE AND HOPE SURVIVES AND LOVE IS REAL!
We are in officer cabins. We have two officer cabins and two passenger cabins (PAX!). Obviously, the people who designed the crew cabins knew the experience of life as a crew member, which is totally different from a passenger. Mainly:
SIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIILLLLLLLLLLEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEENCE! DELICIOUS SILENCE! O LORD SILENCE!!!
My PORTHOLE means I am awoken by SUNSHINE and you can hear the waves gently hit the boat and see a reflection of light dancing on your ceiling. But muted, calm, SILENT. I know I would go crazy if I were not allowed to leave this room. I know this with my brain. I do not know this with my SOUUUUL.
Pax hallways stretch the length of the ship and go in a ring. Every third on each side is manned by two room stewards that work constantly in the morning and at night. They each have a room cleaning cart. This is perfect for the vacationing people because it is a complaining-ice-breaker that might end up in a “hahaha, let’s get drinks.” For people who work and live here, it results in “this is where I will die. Here. I will die here. Everything is pointless.” Which is a lie. Does this happen in crew hallways? Where my hallway is a self contained “corridor” of about 9 rooms off of a big hallway? In a crew area? Where everyone is working and running around? NOOOOOOOOOOO! NO! NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO NO!
This ship is radically different than the other ships because it is gorgeous. It was built in 2005. It is gorgeous. The cheese element is still there (“amazing” was used at least 40 times in the opening show, “ladies and gentlemen” probably 30) but everything is new and well designed and clean and in 2005 Starbucks-ie style, so it feels gorgeous and like they know exactly what I want to see, which maybe means it is trendy.
In an interesting note, there was apparently a terrorist attack at sea somewhere hahaha. So now we have a bunch of signs in the crew areas with a number to call if we see any terrorist activity hahaha. So hopefully that will never ever ever be useful.
Sunday, November 30, 2008
Thursday, November 20, 2008
Another Break, Getting Dark Out
I am about to go on another tour of duty. In the off time, I have done the following things with great joy, and that is not ironic at all:
Cleaned a friend's apartment
Done dishes
Made food
Taken out trash
Driven and navigated
O Lord, O Lord in Heaven, the sweet joy of not being helpless, O Lord, O Lord, O Lord.
I also heard a little kid whine on the plane during sunset: "I don't WAAANT it to get dark out" which made me laugh out loud.
The ship doctors informed me I had an eye infection which a Pennsylvania doctor informed me was actually allergies. When I talked about going on the boat again, I burst into tears outside of a dressing room. This is payback for noticing an Asian lady full on crying talking to her friend's in Filene's in San Francisco with Serpe. She kept moving and we kept finding her. Transitions are emotional! Obvious is obvious! I don't WAAAAAANT it to be annoying! And watch the boat feel like it is where I now belong. O boat.
Highlights of vacation include driving with Serpe from LA to San Fran, meeting Marion's baby (poor conversationalist ZING!), Eve's New Orleans, Heather & Josh's Hospitality Ultimahht, and seeing my parents.
This is a shout out to Graci, the other highlight. We had a fun chat and it gets so good to see people who are not your castmates that it is difficult not to weep with joy, which a normal person would not, could not understand.
Otherwise, in LA, plans got changed a bunch with cronies, which is not a big deal, but add the desperation of seeing people with limited time, and I will happily write you a 50 page treatsie about why LA is an abomination of a disaster.
Also, if you would like a newfound appreciation for American/North American males, go on a cruise ship!!! Work there!!! Where there aren't any hahaha!!! Then come back!!! You will fall in love every 4 seconds!!! Based on polarfleece!!! Except for the North American males who sleep face down with no shoes next to a bowl of food in front of a Rite Aid smack in the middle of the sidewalk, which LA furnished me. I don't WAAAAANT them to be homeless!
For those of you who are not actors, I give you this, a typical email that I get from a casting placement place:
---
Hey Guys! So we have had [Person Name] from [Casting/Office] in alot over the
years and he has been great to us!! But the new gal over at this GREAT TV
office is [New Person]. We have only had her in one other time and
everyone loved her. She is fun, smart and knows her stuff!! She looks
forward to finding talent at workshops and [Casting/Office]is known for
rarely using breakdowns for costar and guest star roles. They trust
people like [Person] to find fantastic talent like you!! They always have
pilots and they always have fun shows with big guest casts!!!
11/20/2008 Thursday 07:30 PM [New Person]w/[Casting/Office] $35
---
I don't WAAAAANT them to be fake!!!
Cleaned a friend's apartment
Done dishes
Made food
Taken out trash
Driven and navigated
O Lord, O Lord in Heaven, the sweet joy of not being helpless, O Lord, O Lord, O Lord.
I also heard a little kid whine on the plane during sunset: "I don't WAAANT it to get dark out" which made me laugh out loud.
The ship doctors informed me I had an eye infection which a Pennsylvania doctor informed me was actually allergies. When I talked about going on the boat again, I burst into tears outside of a dressing room. This is payback for noticing an Asian lady full on crying talking to her friend's in Filene's in San Francisco with Serpe. She kept moving and we kept finding her. Transitions are emotional! Obvious is obvious! I don't WAAAAAANT it to be annoying! And watch the boat feel like it is where I now belong. O boat.
Highlights of vacation include driving with Serpe from LA to San Fran, meeting Marion's baby (poor conversationalist ZING!), Eve's New Orleans, Heather & Josh's Hospitality Ultimahht, and seeing my parents.
This is a shout out to Graci, the other highlight. We had a fun chat and it gets so good to see people who are not your castmates that it is difficult not to weep with joy, which a normal person would not, could not understand.
Otherwise, in LA, plans got changed a bunch with cronies, which is not a big deal, but add the desperation of seeing people with limited time, and I will happily write you a 50 page treatsie about why LA is an abomination of a disaster.
Also, if you would like a newfound appreciation for American/North American males, go on a cruise ship!!! Work there!!! Where there aren't any hahaha!!! Then come back!!! You will fall in love every 4 seconds!!! Based on polarfleece!!! Except for the North American males who sleep face down with no shoes next to a bowl of food in front of a Rite Aid smack in the middle of the sidewalk, which LA furnished me. I don't WAAAAANT them to be homeless!
For those of you who are not actors, I give you this, a typical email that I get from a casting placement place:
---
Hey Guys! So we have had [Person Name] from [Casting/Office] in alot over the
years and he has been great to us!! But the new gal over at this GREAT TV
office is [New Person]. We have only had her in one other time and
everyone loved her. She is fun, smart and knows her stuff!! She looks
forward to finding talent at workshops and [Casting/Office]is known for
rarely using breakdowns for costar and guest star roles. They trust
people like [Person] to find fantastic talent like you!! They always have
pilots and they always have fun shows with big guest casts!!!
11/20/2008 Thursday 07:30 PM [New Person]w/[Casting/Office] $35
---
I don't WAAAAANT them to be fake!!!
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